The Four Ubers of the ApocalypseAnd I opened the App and requested a ride uptown, and soon I beheld a driver with a long white beard, and when I entered the back seat he…Apr 7, 2022Apr 7, 2022
Freudian Police BlotterA caller told dispatch they had been reading Freud’s “Introduction to Psychoanalysis” and had gone to the kitchen to get some water and had…Sep 17, 2021Sep 17, 2021
Bird Reviews of your Lawn SprinklerI just have to say that your sprinkler must have been engineered by us Robins, because the water volume and distribution is very efficient…Aug 14, 2021Aug 14, 2021
Here is Your Free Right-Wing Militia Remarketing Analysis!Dear Right-wing Militia Leader,Jul 30, 2021Jul 30, 2021
God Calls About Your Extended Car WarrantyHello, this is God! I’ve been trying to reach you concerning your car’s extended warranty. You should have received my postcard in the…Jul 23, 2021Jul 23, 2021
Terms of Service for Your New Lawn SprinklerCongratulations on purchasing your 100% Brass High Quality Lawn Sprinkler manufactured to the highest quality control standards! Your new…Jul 17, 2021Jul 17, 2021
Henry David Thoreau at StarbucksI went to my local Starbucks because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of a life made up of sugar and…Jul 10, 2021Jul 10, 2021
Published inSlackjawFolk Music Police BlotterA caller reported hearing loud acoustic guitar music with off-key, sarcastic lyrics from the brownstone next door.May 8, 2021May 8, 2021
